#3 Falling in love with your own story It doesn't matter which side you are on, falling in love with "your own story" is a dangerous thing to do. You know what I'm referring to - you've all been mystified by a dogmatic stance taken by the "other side", based on something that seems irrelevant to the case. This is all too easy to recognize in the opposition, but often quite difficult to recognize in one's self. Falling in love with "your own story" means becoming fixated on an issue that is not specifically relevant to the case, and allowing it to become the justification for your position. Allow me to give you a couple of hypothetical examples: << MORE >>

Research shows, and personal experience confirms, there are a handful of negotiation strategies and tactics that, when employed, illicit predictably similar results. Some tactics will result in a positively short mediation, but will produce a less than desirable result. Others will surely lengthen the process, and if they persist, will also ensure further litigation. The following are common negotiation killers, along with alternative actions likely to result in killer negotiations (as in productive). In ascending order, here are #5 and #4: << MORE >>

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I am on your side. Seriously, I am. I know, I know, mediators are to be completely neutral, unbiased, and unattached to the outcome. So, how can I possibly be on YOUR side?  Doesn't that put me in direct violation of the ethical requirements for a Florida Supreme Court Certified Circuit Civil mediator? Absolutely not, and I'll tell you why:  I'm on "their" side too. What?? That ... << MORE >>

...Every now and then a day comes along when it feels like “Murphy’s Law” is working overtime. I had one of those days recently - it went like this:<< MORE >>

Hi! Welcome to the first edition of Conflict = Opportunity!, a monthly newsletter about mediating through life, written by me, Karen Pelot. As this is the introductory edition, I decided to reintroduce myself to you, and begin to spark your interest in the ongoing story of how Conflict = Opportunity!... << MORE >>

Ever hear the one about the elephant and the three blind men? Three blind men went to the circus and came upon an elephant. There were no elephants where they came from, and they were thrilled to encounter such a great beast. The first blind man grabbed its trunk and declared “It is like a mighty snake.” The second grabbed its hind leg and exclaimed “No, you are wrong! It is like a great oak tree.” The third held its tail and protested “You are both wrong! It is like a strong rope.” Interestingly, they were all right and all wrong. Their descriptions were honestly based on their individual perceptions; and their perceptions were based on their individual experiences. Just like life! And for our purposes today, just like conflict... << MORE >>

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